Entre Nous. Every girl needs an inner French girl

It is used far too much but when you really look at it, really make the words mean what they might have the first time someone used what is now a cliche, "broken heart" is terribly descriptive. Something is broken, jangly, all sharp edges. Something essential is now detritus. Something isn't working anymore.

I'm too old for it but having my heart broken has left me untethered and unable to remember what used to interest me. Nothing does, much; not anymore. Some call this "losing the centre" and that's how it feels -- where there was once focus and comfort, a path and a long list of shared habits there is now....nothing. A blank. A blank that nonetheless hurts like hell.

My friends tell me the cure is to turn inside, though not in mourning. They mean return the focus from HIM to myself, they encourage all manner of pampering and indulgence. I used to say the same to them, when it was their turn to be in bits on the side of the road. Damn hard to do, though, when the "self" that was once loved and assumed lovable has been so summarily and peremptorily rejected. It's hard to get selfish when you wish your self would just go away.

But as in all things, there is a cure in a book. Not a typical self-help book though I cast no aspersion, there may be good ones out there. I have been reading, over and over again, Entre Nous. I have just recently felt a twinge of interest in releasing my own inner French girl. We all have one, let's face it.This little silly frivolous fun book is the doctor's orders. It tells of doing just what we must in this condition -- tend to our own garden, pull in a bit, don't give away so much. Be respectful of your own time and your own self -- body, spirit, mind. Dress better, take good care of your skin, nurture your interests and your mind, be a little mysterious. Know your own worth and make sure that any applicants for your time or good humour are worthy of your time, interest, energy. But mostly, nurture your mind and your soul. Become happy in your own skin. Don't give up solitude too easily. Learn to value yourself so much that you can spot a monster a mile away....because you really would rather spend time on your own than with someone not quite appreciative enough. Love yourself the way you wish he did.

Too crazy? Mad? Silly? It's working.